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Dienstag, April 21, 2009

The empire strikes back: poisoning Taiwanese with bitter chocolate

There is one thing I hate about Taiwan (well, actually there is a whole catalog, but let's ignore that for now) and that is Taiwan's shops practically only offering some middle quality chocolate bars like Snickers or Twix and besides that only bitter chocolate and nut chocolate; most of the times at least. They manage to import a whole shelf of Ritter Sport chocolate, I get my mouth watering at the sheer sight of it and then .... only nut nut nuts... I go... you picture it, nuts about it.

Oh how I enjoyed feeding this to my colleagues (evil laughter, spotlight from below)

Taiwanese don't like sweet chocolate, so when you bring them any chocolate as a present they hold it in their hands, look at it with this superior 5000 year culture view and respond "ah sweet chocolate.... it's sweet, right?". I regularly have to stop myself from taking the chocolate back and advising them to bite into the desk, as it is not sweet. Yes holy frakking mystery of the universe, chocolate is sweet, who would have guessed?

But now I had my revenge. We found some 99% Lindt chocolate in our fridge. Without being a trained and certified 99% chocolate conoisseur, you will bite of a big part and then it taste like ... like that stuff you use to glue the windows in place, salty and earhy (yes, I tasted it once by accident I guess). So we passed it freely to colleagues, their eyes got this 5000-years-oh-yeah-we-ChineseTaiwanese-or-whatever-we-are-only-eat-bitter-chocolate look again, they put it in their mouths preparing for sheer lust to kick in and then.... their eyes came bulging out, one even gasped and asked "do you have sugar?"

This was my ultimate triumphe, thank you Lindt for making this possible.

I enjoyed the rest of the chocolate, bitten off in small lumps with a bit of black tea. Hmmmmm...

[evil giggle]


Marquis de Schoko-sade

1 Kommentar:

Miriam hat gesagt…

Hierzulande ist die bittere Schokolade ja v.a. die Schokolade der ganz gesundheitsbewussten und hochintelligenten Mitmenschen, sie soll ja soooooo gesund sein; ich muss bei solchen Sachen irgendwie immer an das Märchen von des Kaisers neuen Kleidern denken...