Taipei: another foreign resident dying after traffic accident

The real danger of Taiwan is the traffic. Again and again I hear foreigners get caught up in the insanity people call road traffic here. Shortly ago the founder of a stray-dog rescue organization in Taiwan reported he saw an English teacher (from Canada if I remember correctly) being injured fatally by a truck changing lanes; the dog rescuer managed to comfort the dying man a bit. Recently there was another fatality of a foreigner mentioned. And in October a teacher of the Taipei American School was fatally injured when crossing the road (http://www.tas.edu.tw/page.cfm?p=464&newsid=99). There is hardly any crime on Taiwan's street, but the real danger lies with untrained drivers having a lot of unjustified self-confidence when driving. They hardly use the mirrors, step on the gas as if engaged in a race and are often under the influence of alcohol or somewhat stimulating soft drugs like betlenut taken in combination with stimulating or sense-deafening local "energy" drinks like "Whisby" (originally created to replace alcoholic drinks).

Taiwan is a safe and very guest-friendly country and a great place to be introduced into a friendly version of Chinese culture. But please be damned careful on the roads. Or when stepping out of your apartment door.

"NIA care what you care!"

 "Taipei 101", this was until recently the highest house on the globe

Astonishing. Taiwan's National Immigration Agency NIA has selected an English speaking slogan to improve their perception among foreigners. The result was being picked from a competition which a Taiwanese teenager has won. His slogan is "NIA care what you care".

Now this obviously sounds like Chinglish gibberish which will be the result of a Taiwanese of high position within the NIA having the responsibility for choosing the slogan and then not being able to admit he or she does not speak proper English.

Well, "NIA Hao***" would have been better, wouldn't it?

http://forumosa.com/taiwan/viewtopic.php?f=89&t=90946

This Chinglish slogan is well within the tradition of the previous slogan "TAIWAN UP" which even had been shown on Taipei's skyscraper "Taipei 101" this new year's eve.


*** "Ni hao" would be the informal Chinese hello and "Nin hao" the more formal one.

The scent of a woman

Morning in gray Taipei. While the locals are rolling to work on their scooters, some pretty foreign ladies are already preparing their day's work

Not one, many. Almost each morning I pick up food from a breakfast food booth close to my company and will use the elevator on my way back. It is 7.30 in the morning and either the elevator is already full of them or they come running to still jump onto it. Philippian ladies working in my company. It is a bit of a strange sight in the morning, when I am standing alone among them, they are often around 1.50m or below, which makes me towering out of their midst, their hair still wet from the shower and the cent of soap in the air. They are giggling and talking in Spanish and their native language while we ride up to the 6th floor. And when I am late they are already cleaning the white closets of the test department. Recently they were listing to this "I am your lady and you are my man" song, singing along with it while cleaning the closets. And their eyes looked dreamy, as if they were far away from dirty and gray Taipei, probably on a Philippine beach with some well-built beau.

Just a morning impression here from the right-hand edge of the world plate...

Taiwan low on desired places scale

+++ forget what is said below. Womenfolk is pretty and feeds me cookies, who cares about the rest. +++

English:  - German below-
Taiwan is called "(Isla) Formosa", the beautiful island by its European name.Still, nobody wants to move here, as this statistic shows: http://www.gallup.com/poll/124193/Potential-Net-Migration-Change-Developed-Nations.aspx .Strangely, Taiwan is in the same group as poverty-stricken Ivory Coast and Ukraine. Taiwan is a rich country, yet where business immigrants end up is usually Taipei, the capital in the North and here car pollution, ugly architecture and the habit of the locals to turn their environment into one big litter box are prevalent. Working conditions are also not exactly favourable, with companies often willing to pay only the local salary plus a bonus and you even have to fight hard to get at least unpaid vacation in the beginning - the first year in Taiwan comes without any paid vacation by Taiwan's labour law. Being a bit of a masochist helps to accept work in a small Taiwan company where the boss is an egocentric "Captain Ahab" and his or her subordinates follow him around with their heads lowered.
Work hours are long, engineers often have 12hrs per day and often include Saturdays and sometimes Sundays into the working week. You do fine with a local salary if you buy in the local diners where foreigners have a hard time to order anything because of language barrier. You do not come very far when relying on Westernized restaurants, the price may be tenfold.
But... the country has its advantages. Come, survive and find out!

Taiwan: come in and find out. Komm rein und finde wieder raus.

German, Deutsch:
Taiwan schneidet extrem niedrig in einer "wohin man auswandern will"-Statistik ab, der negative Wert, identisch mit dem der Elfenbeinküste und der Ukraine, zeigt sogar Abwanderungspotential, nicht Einwanderungspotential an: http://www.gallup.com/poll/124193/Potential-Net-Migration-Change-Developed-Nations.aspx . Wer hier aus wirtschaftlichen Gründen landet, der logiert in der Regel in Taipei, jener von Chinesen (nicht Taiwanesen) dominierten Karikatur einer Metropole, in der Mopeds räuchernd und knatternd zwischen schmutzigen Wohnblocks umher fahren. Ich habe da mindestens dreimal täglich einen negativen persönlichen Einwanderungsindex. Arbeitsbedingungen sind sicher auch nicht attraktiv für Expats, u.a. ohne bezahlten Urlaub im ersten Jahr, siehe Übersicht HIER. Insbesondere verdient man, wenn man selbst auf dem Arbeitsmarkt aufschlägt, oft nur etwas mehr als Einheimische und würde beim Essenskauf oft auf teure westlich scheinende Lokale angewiesen sein, weil die Verständigung in den Garküchen fast unmöglich ist. Taiwan macht manchmal Aktionen, wo Umfrageformulare an Ausländer in Taiwan geschickt werden und startet dann Initiativen, um "ausländische Fachkräfte" anzuwerben. In den Formularen wird man durch die Struktur dazu gebracht, immer Essen, freundliche Leute und hübsche Tempel zu loben und darf als vorgefertigte Kritikpunkte "zu viel Verkehr" und manchmal "Abgasverschmutzung" angeben, letzteres auch nur manchmal.
Vorteile hat Taiwan natürlich auch. Kommen Sie hier, überleben Sie den Smog und finden Sie es raus ;-)

You look like Tom Cruise...

Really you do! Trust me.

Western male foreigners in Taiwan almost always get the "You look like Tom Cruise" routine, if they somehow are the white Caucasian type. Probably because to Taiwanese people who see only few foreigners, all white males look the same at first. A similar phenomena is surely known from home, I remember older Germans, back in the days when there were fewer foreigners in Germany (70s or so) to say "all Asians look alike" or stuff like that. There is a biological explanation to it: if you see one person having bushy eyebrows and being bald you will probably not remember much else of his face, because our brain is lazy and focuses on the most important distinguishable features. Seeing another bald guy a week later with bushy eyebrows makes you think they look alike, even though they most likely look totally different. However if you see bushy eyebrowed bald people every day, you will start to look for other discriminating features.

So I tend to roll my eyes to the ceiling when I hear this. Anyway, my new movie sucks, doesn't it?

The chieftain and the Taiwanese cellphone

In Taiwan weird things are happening and people behave... differently. Like Taiwan's president Ma handing out a cellphone to a tribal chief of the Solomon islands as a gift was nothing special, but the later discussion about it was strange. The Taiwanese are openly discussing (http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/taiwan/archives/2010/03/31/2003469374) if the gift was appropriate or something more practical would have been better. What the hell do they mean, a bathtub instead or what did they have in mind?
While this discussion will surely be very embarrassing for the chief, it does not stop at this point but now they even discuss, if the man is able to use a cellphone. If you click on the link you can see a photo where the minister of foreign affairs is actually making a test call if they chieftain picks up the phone or not. This is a behavior which is quite typical on the island. The locals here deem themselves to be more intelligent than whites and especially darker skinned people and show this feeling of superiority very clearly and often in a rude way. "Ey darkie, phone alright? Or want a bathtub instead?" Dark skinned people encounter many bad stereotypes here in Taiwan, like being told when applying for an English teaching job that blacks could not speak proper English - and that to US citizens! What surprises me is even the government giving a darker skinned person this treatment - on an official level.

Well, the Solomon chief was hanging up the phone the article said. I can absolutely understand that move.

Note how the article points out the chief would own three cellphones and would have told the Taiwanese he knew how to use them. This is news worth reporting in the Taipei times! Guess how clever they are!

Mon dieu.

Edit: OK, the Taiwanese racism is not really hateful, it comes across surprisingly straight forward and without shame. Friendly bunch though. And clever bastards.

Taiwan wants you to make babies!

That was the slogan for the new year party this year. Not too bad actually...
Image from the company server (have changed it a bit :-)
Taiwan up: http://www.chinapost.com.tw/taiwan/local/taipei/2010/01/04/239180/Taiwan-remains.htm

OK, Taiwan has the lowest birth rate on the planet, I can understand that, all we do here is to sit in the office, stand in jammed traffic, eat and sleep and the guys around me don't recognize a mini skirt when it hits them its hem in the face, but... maybe a catchy slogan can change all that. Because the Taiwan government will give an award of 1.000.000 Taiwan dollars to the person coming up with a catchy slogan which encourages "everyone" to have babies.

http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/taiwan/archives/2010/03/17/2003468264

So far Taiwan's foreign community has a bunch of suggestions (http://forumosa.com/taiwan/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=86768), cynical as usual, among them

The world needs more Chinese people

Fuck, Taiwan

and something like

While you are waiting for your white knight... shag someone in blue sandals

I personally think the middle one is rather creative as it is not the usual wording which foreigners occasionally use to curse their hospitable guest country (that would be without the comma) but is actually a variation of it.

So if you need money, what about coming up with something? Crude English will do, that's what the guys in the government can understand best.

Hmmm, what about:

Stop letting the stray dogs breed. Go for it yourself!

Or maybe

The males are those who don't use so much makeup

Well, they do wear pink shirts and Hello Kitty stickers on their scooter helmets, so maybe it is a problem of finding them...

So, any better suggestions?

What about "yes, we can"?

Taiwan, the hell hole?

German below, Deutsch unten

English:
A web page wants to assess how livable countries are, see here: http://www.il-ireland.com/il/qofl2009/.
Now, USA ranks No.3 in the table, so that must be Shangri-La combined with free massage parlors and no crime whatsoever. It is just behind France and Switzerland (I always do think the waiters on Champs Elysees in France are a bit scary though. Never mind.
My home country Germany is number 8, right below Italy. That might sound like a fair assessment, bella Italia surely has its benefits over my country.

Wait, there are parks in Taipei, Taiwan. This one even has political freedom (Falun Gong practitioners or however they are called)
EDIT: well it's religious freedom, only the PRC makes it seem political

But now where is Taiwan, called "Republic of China" by its formal name, wait a minute. Ah there, No. 58 or something, directly above South Africa and a bit above Ukraine. And below Mexico.

But now let's play a game. Let's say you are a stupid tourist family, driving with your big rented Sedan which has a big HERTZ or whatever sticker on it through the country in question, cameras clicking, wearing a shirt saying "I've got money" in the local language. Now say, we do that in South Africa. I guess the family has a good chance to be raped, mugged and decomposed down to their gold teeth in Mexico, South Africa and Ukraine, if they drive through the wrong parts. But all they would get in Taiwan are a few friendly "hello"s, even from betlenut chewing tattooed big guys.

OK, the table is about living, not tourism. But what if they family moves into the respective country because dad has a job a local branch of his home company and they buy a big and shiny sedan and take a trip through the country... same situation like tourism.

However, if dad was so naive to move into one of the crowded middle class areas, like I did in 2004, he might get respiratory problems, circulation problems and thrombosis, if the country is Taiwan. Just as I had before I moved into the countryside.

So I guess the evaluation depends on your personal perspective. I'd prefer Taiwan to Mexico, Taiwan is one of the safest countries on earth.

P.S: Also see here: http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/front/archives/2010/01/14/2003463481: Freedom House still evaluates Taiwan as free, but sees defendant's rights in decline in penal cases.


German, Deutsch:

Die Webseite http://www.il-ireland.com/il/qofl2009/ versucht die Lebenqualität von Ländern zu bewerten, Frankreich ist die Nummer 1, die Schweiz die Nummer 2 und die USA die Nummer 3. Italien ist Nummer 7 und Deutschland Nummero 8. Unser kleines Taiwan findet sich an Position 58 oder so, ganz weit unten jedenfalls, gleich über Südafrika. Mir kam der Gedanke, wie wenig solch eine Liste so pauschaliert aussagt, gerade weil die wenigen Kriterien wenig aussagekräftig sind. Sinnvoller wäre es sicherlich, alle Länder etwa so einzuordnen (habe das Mal am Beispiel von Deutschland und Taiwan versucht, 0-100%, mehr ist besser, alles "pi mal Daumen"):

Umwelt: Deutschland 80%, Taiwan 30%
Wirtschaft (i.A.): D: 60%, T 70%)
Sicherheit vor Kriminalität i.A.: D 45%, T 75%
Sicherheit von Ausländern: D 55%, T 90%
Nichtelektronische Infrastruktur inkl. Verkehr: D 85%, T 70%
Elektronische und Telekommunikationsinfrastruktur: D 75%, T 75%
Tierschutz: D 60%, T 10%
Sicherheit vor Naturkatastrophen: D 90%, T 35%
Sicherheit vor Terrorismus, Krieg: D 70%, T 35%

etc. etc.

Da müsste man richtige Kriterien und Bewertungsmaßstäbe aufstellen....

Edit: Nachdem ich gestern abend wieder in meinem Haus bei 10 Grad Plus ohne Heizung gefroren habe, nur mit einem Heizdrahtding versehen, das mich hinten gekocht hat, während ich vorne eiskalt war, sage ich: Lasst uns dies verdammte Taiwan auf Position 99 der Liste setzen! Grrr..... Zähneklapper

Taiwan: Foreign employees have no rights, unless married

Women come "all in one" with civil rights for foreigners in Taiwan...

Taiwan has a lot of English teachers from English speaking countries, mainly US and Canada. They are in Taiwan on work-related "ARC"s, which means Alien Residence Permits. Foreigners basically have no rights in Taiwan, there is a law stating foreigners may not interfere with politics and they can be extradited from the country without a reason given. English teachers usually get royally screwed by their employers because their work permit/ARC depends on them. "Maoman", who runs Taiwan's expat forum Forumosa.com, had organized a meeting with government representatives (http://forumosa.com/taiwan/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=84289&start=0) and the whole affair was seemingly totally embarrassing. The government representatives refused to hand out their name cards, were absolutely uninterested in taking part in the proceedings and were rather insulting than helpful, see the link above.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, you are granted a bit of right if you are married to a local, and that is sure something. Otherwise your shady "bushiban" cram-school boss, if you are one of the countless English teachers here, can feel free to screw you whenever he wants and you do not have any possibilities to get him to do what he or she is required to do by law, is basically the outcome of the meeting.

Building up one's life here is dangerous as you can not enforce any kind of right to stay in the country even after an extended period of time. Well, I am not planning on staying that long [gosh, is it really 5 years already?]

Otherwise you are treated friendly and can usually feel welcomed in Taiwan, at least if you are a white guy, as this matches the image Taiwanese have of an "American" whom they see in a positive light. But still, you have no rights.

[glad not to be an English teacher]

Yes, people are friendly

Did I mention people are friendly in Taiwan? It seems foreign females in Taiwan get a little too much attention though (http://forumosa.com/taiwan/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=84639). I mean a little old fashioned compliment would do, not just get to it right away. But getting to it has only one participant in this case. Thank you God for being a guy here. No, the ladies don't do that when they see me [how to switch off imagination now?].

Taiwanese surveys

No chance in Taiwanese surveys to really complain about anything. Like butt-ugly towns, insane traffic or smelly unhealthy food stalls [chicken booth with chicken meat and living chickens right behind it, Jhongli, Taoyuan county].***

I came across many Taiwan government surveys made for foreigners while being here, all were steering you in the direction of saying:

* the food is good
* the people are friendly
* the temples are impressive
* the people are friendly, did I mention that?

And regarding not so good things:

* the traffic is a little too crowded
* maybe occasionally, in rush hours, when there is a full moon, a tiny wee bit of pollution, but it's not so bad, really!

This happens, because the selectable answers to the questions leave no other choice. The recent poll (http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/front/archives/2009/12/17/2003461159) was a little different, it asked endless questions about "websites for foreigners" which I do not even know, and, also made you say people are friendly in Taiwan. Hope you got the point now.

And, being a big fetish in Taiwan, the result has to be the English ability of people would be good or average. Everything else is not aloud as it would make them lose face.


OK here is my own:

What about the Taiwan people [note: do never say TaiwanESE people, that would be an ethnic expression and is disputed in Taiwan]?

(a) very friendly
(b) friendly
(c) oh my god, they are friendly!

What do you like in Taiwan?

(a) food
(b) people [they are friendly you know!]
(c) temples

What is not so good?

(a) traffic
(b) sometimes the air, but I don't really care and the good people of Taiwan are improving a lot every day!!!!!!!

How good do the Taiwanese speak English?

(a) very good
(b) vely good
(c) good
(d) much better than we lognoses speak Chinese because they are more clever anyway

How do you characterize Taiwan [choose 3]?

(a) friendly people
(b) good food
(c) impressive temples

Thank you for taking part in our survey!

OK, a little more serious, the survey from the link above did not give me the opportunity to express the information on the website would be superficial and generalized and thus useless.

A realistic question from a survey about foreigners, which I have encountered many times in a similar fashion is:

Choose what you like best about Taiwan: ()temples ()friendly people ()good infrastructure ()career opportunities.

No wonder the survey will have as a result that most foreigners here are satisfied.


*** wife says I am complaining too much today :-)

Foreigners are convenient (blame them for the ... weather)

I guess to have a few foreigners on the rock of Taiwan must be a convenient thing as they make a scapegoat for everything which crosses the mind of the locals. Or they can wave their hands at them and glorify them, whatever comes to mind.

White guy (looks like one to me with brown hair) in cage in Taiwan anti-child sex tourism ad. Well, Taiwan does not have a child sex tourism problem, there are hardly any tourists here to begin with...

Now, Taiwan is not Thailand and there are hardly any tourists here. Which means customers of local prostitutes are 99.99% locals and all prostitutes I have ever seen were clearly adults. There are Japanese business men going to some chalets in countryside which are having adult prostitutes. And there are a few ads in the English Taipei times where some call girls offer there service at thigh charge (I guess) to foreign business men. Less prostitution here than at the local train station in my German home town.

So as this seems to be an anti-child sex tourism ad, as indicated here (LINK and here LINK), why is there a whitey in the cage in the pic? A few foreigners are working here as English teachers and are busy chasing the 28 y.o. secretaries and female motherboard product managers they meet at the local 7/11. They look like late 17 and have the personality of 14 y.o. with their hello kitty handbag. You think, until you have met their mums and you are suddendly married.

There will be undoubtedly some illegal places somewhere in a backyard with minor prostitutes, just like every country has a few sad examples of such cases, but the few whiteys here don't even know where to find such places. I couldn't find even a normal brothel here at gunpoint. So customers of such an illegal place will be locals. Means the guy in the friggin image should have black hair and wear blue slippers just like the locals.

Could anybody who can read friggin' Mandarin tell me what is actually written on that sign?

EDIT: this US paper (LINK) is mentioning people from poor Asian countries are being brought to Taiwan to work illegaly as prostitutes or other jobs. Not only women are mentioned, but also boys and girls. Again I have to point out the usual customer of prostitutes in Taiwan is a Taiwanese male. Taiwan hardly has tourists and Taiwan's red light business usually does NOT service white people (similar to Japan). Taiwan is a rich country, Taiwan people are on the tourist side of the sex tourism problem, not on the victim side. So they should not push this problem onto the few whites in Taiwan, otherwise this campaign is helping no-one.

EDIT: a reader in the comments below explained to me this can be viewed by Taiwanese eyes like "Taiwan takes part in arresting some (white) child molesters who are hiding in Taiwan". This actually makes sense, there are such people hiding on the island, sometimes even opening kid's English schools.

Donating blood for Typhoon victims? No, because...

homepage teichert-online.de( ) , Formosablog(X), Techblog( )

German below, Deutsch unten!

In company they are asking for blood donations for the typhoon victims. Wife said "let's go" but I politely rejected. Reason is, I have heard many times that blood from foreigners is being rejected in Taiwan, because we longnoses are believed to have AIDS and all that jazz, as we are constantly in bed with women and take all kinds of drugs, some locals think. A foreigner just tried it and got rejected, see HERE (<--LINK). So, no, I will not queue up there and go through the trouble only to be (a) rejected upfront or (b) having the stuff thrown away secretly. Rather keep my V-Juice to myself.
Still takes some getting used to, being seen as a dirty second or third class citizen :-)

Foreign blood is usually much too pulsating to be donated in Taiwan.

EDIT: I guess Taiwan is buying blood reserves from the free market now, because of the great number of victims. What do they tell the blood vendors when buying? We only want blood from Chinese people? Are other Asian nationalities accepted? But we don't want this Caucasian blood, you know it has this metallic finish which doesn't really fit to the overall fruity flavor...



German/Deutsch:

[Nachtrag zum Englischen oben, wo ich mich beschwere, dass hier zwar in Anbetracht der Taifunopfer zu Blutspenden aufgerufen wird, aber Ausländer (öfter) abgelehnt werden]
OK, ob die Leute hier nun Langnasenblut wollen oder nicht, ist ja eigentlich auch egal. Im Fernsehen werden hier gerade Zerstörungen gezeigt: Häuser, die in den Fluß gerissen werden, während die Besitzer in Tränen ausbrechen, Rettungskräfte, die mit Schlauchbooten durch reißende Ströme fahren und dabei ertrinken, Im reißenden Fluß Treibende, die sich anfangs noch bewegen, später nicht mehr.
Ein Dorf, in dem 298 Menschen gestorben sind, Menschen die von einem Apfel 3 Tage leben mussten, Bauern vor zerstörten Plantagen. Da werde ich jetzt mal mein Gemeckere einstellen, die Bilder werden immer schlimmer.
Rettungskräfte sind überall effektiv im Einsatz, aber kommen nicht dagegen an.

Obiges Gemeckere wirkt jetzt deplaziert, da war mir auch das ganze Ausmaß der Katastrophe noch nicht klar. Ganze Dörfer sind jetzt eine glatte Schlammkuhle, nur ein Haus hat von 20 oder 30 überlebt am Rand.

Na ja, ich verdünn mein Blut vor Schreck mit einem Whisky und spende was. Geld wird immer genommen, denke ich.

EDIT: Fakten bzgl. der Blutspende: Man kann als Ausländer Blut spenden, wer in den 90ern in GB gelebt hat (oder es besucht hat?) wird abgelehnt; Leute sind sogar wegen eines Ohrrings (!) abgelehnt worden, weil man dann Hepatitis haben könne, sagte der Arzt. Es ist klar, beohrringte Taiwanesinnen werden nicht abgelehnt.
Quelle: HIER (<--LINK)

Unklar ist, ob nicht angenommene Blutspenden vernichtet werden, damit der Ausländer "sein Gesicht wahren kann", indem ihm die Ablehnung erspart bleibt, wie jemand in einer früheren Diskussion glaubte zu wissen.

Being a foreigner in Taiwan ... and Germany

Reading my last complain about being called a “longnose” in Taiwan (LINK) may make Taiwan seem like a country which treats its visitors unfriendly. Moreover, it may seem as if things in my own country, Germany, would be always perfect, while they are not in Taiwan. This is incorrect and so I like to compare being a foreigner in Germany vs. being one in Taiwan a bit. Of course, being a native German, I can only guess from reactions from my wife, who is Taiwanese, and what I have heard from other foreigners in Germany, what it is like.

So in Taiwan you may be laughed at; fun at your expense. Longnose, you are fat, your belly is so big, “do you only drink coke and eat burgers?” But all this while also being told “you look like Tom Cruise” and “you are handsome”. Not too bad when you sum it up.

In Germany however, things are entirely different. Even looking substantially different from the average German, you will receive a standard treatment from almost all people. Meaning, they are used to foreign looking people around and it is general consent that people should be treated equally and are not to be made uncomfortable or given an outsider feeling. If you are dark skinned or Asian, some people might give you a second look but will quickly turn their eyes anywhere else when you notice it; you have your right of privacy and being treated equally.

Germany can suck as well. But the Gummibaerchen are really good...

However, there are some people who actually are prejudiced, but they will pretend not to be and show normal behaviour, because having racial prejudice is not commonly accepted and kind of out-ruled by society.

There are however subtle or suddenly happening strange things. Like me and my wife getting the “Ah, bought a Thailand wife from catalogue” line when walking on the street or a dark skinned US-American girl feeling uncomfortable near the train station because men approach her and think a very foreign looking girl (by German standards) near a train station must be prostitute or whatever. People will also complain if foreign spices (smell in the stair case of the house) or noise bothers them and will be more sensitive to the foreign family doing things than to a German family.

In Taiwan, stares of ladies strangely never bother me. Hey, what you looking at over there... I am HERE, god damn it! (company party in 2006)

And of course, besides such little prejudices, there is the big hatred which some (often low IQ) people have against foreigners. Looking at crime statistics, it is most dangerous for an African-looking man to walk the streets of Eastern Germany (the part which was a communist state before the reunion of Germany in 1990). I remember reading about a Japanese University guest professor being beaten up on the streets of (the city of) Dresden just for looking different. Africans had been killed in Germany just when walking the park – I remember incidents in East Germany. In both parts of Germany Turkish immigrants had been killed by mob burning down their house.

Summarizing it, prejudice in Germany is also existing, but usually hidden. And there is definitely racial hatred among some few West Germans and a few more East Germans. And that hatred might sneak up on a foreigner who is just enjoying a walk in a park or sitting in front of his TV set at home. This type of hatred can easily be deadly and is something totally different than Taiwan’s attitude of bothering the “funny longnose”.

This doesn’t mean there is no hatred against dark skinned people in Taiwan. But getting yourself beaten up or even killed because you are a foreigner is quite impossible in Taiwan***. In Germany, all it takes might be a walk in a Dresden park.


*** I have to exclude the night club and pub scene in Taiwan. There are incidents like white guy talks to girl in disco and then getting a bottle over his head by the locals. Or a big story of an African American getting attacked by a large cloud of locals (seemingly some gangster gang associated with the disco). Reported on Forumosa.com and it is never really possible to verify all reports, but they seem likely to me. But I am a married guy and don't walk the bars, so this does not bother me. Alcohol and the Chinese way of hiding feelings all your life (alcohols lets them out) seems to be the key issue here.

"Longnose", "foreign chieftain", other sweet terms

I am sure Taiwanese people would not love to be called a "chink" or "yellow skin" or whatever else in Western countries. In German, we have the term "Schlitzauge", meaning "slit eye", a racist and prejudiced term for Asian people. Using it is an insult and can lead to a heavy fine.

Asian people don't have long noses, but a good sense of making the most of small spaces (photo Ludigel - although that was Korea)

However in Taiwan, the Taipei Times (LINK to article) discussed today if the Taiwanese (not Mandarin-Chinese!) term "Adoah", being used for Western foreigners, would be an insult or not. Taiwan people believe this term would mean "long nose" as it most likely comes from a Japanese or ancient Taiwanese word for a ... long nose, however no-one can scientifically prove what it means. But I guess it is important what people actually think it means, when they use it, and that is "longnose". My wife has trained two of our little nephews to dance around me and call me "Adoah", a longnose, and make a hand guesture indicating a long nose. While it is somewhat cute to watch them, I never got used to all my little nephews laugh about the funny foreigner, but unfortuantely that seems to be quite common in Taiwan and people don't get why they shouldn't call one of those bloody longnoses a longnose. You call an apple an apple, right?

The Taipei Times does not want to draw a conclusion and instead ends with the moronic statement "The jury is still out on whether the word adoah serves a useful purpose today or not. The real judges will be the Taiwanese themselves." Well, yeah, I guess.

Taipei Times asserts in this article, the term "laowai" would be totally normal however. Note, laowai actually means "boss from outside/foreign country" or "respected person from outside", but always has a comical subtone when being used. It is quite similar to the way German people sometimes call an exotic foreigner a "foreign chieftain" (Auslaenderhaeuptling), even this term is viewed racist and degratory, so hardly anyone uses it.

BTW, there is an upside-down version of "laowai" which becomes "wailao" and only relates to blue collar workers from East Asian countries.
The correct Mandarin Chinese term for a foreigner would be "waiguoren", meaning "person from foreign country/outside".

So I guess we longnoses have to live with the shortnoses call us longnoses and chieftains and whatever else. They don't mean it badly, those cute little Taiwanese who are running around foreigners giggling to themselves. Better than people back home who hate foreigners. They would rather beat you up - so I clearly prefer the giggling of the Taiwanese here.

The Taipei Times article has a quote from a Taiwanese person living in the US being asked if they call the Americans "Adoah". The persons says, "no, there are so many of them, we call them laowai instead".

Well, yeah, too many chieftains (laowai) and not enough Indians I guess...

EDIT: And yes, people are friendly here and it is easy to feel welcomed. Just, if you are here long time, this name calling by your little nephews really gets a bit ... annoying. Though they are kind of cute doing it. They make the long nose gesture on the top of heir heads somewhere because they don't get it's about the nose. So there is light at the end of the tunnel :-)

formosa blog: blog.teichert-online.de

other pages:
homepage: teichert-online.de
tech blog: techblog.teichert-online.de
blog overview in categories: globalforeigner.com
taiwan stray dog rescue: stray-dogs.org

Hi, I am Bob from Oregon

At least I must be from Oregon or better yet, Texas or New York, because I am white. Although I think I am not really white but rather piggy-pink. But being white makes you American in Taiwanese eyes. There are quite a lot of people who know that other countries of white people are nations as well, but they assume they are like the US, only have a different name. And of course, we all speak English. Most Taiwanese are always very surprised when they learn people would not speak English in a foreign country. A few days ago I was asked, after confirming the daily language in my country Germany would be German, not English, if we Germans wouldn't be arrogant not to speak English.
I answered with "Well, no, Taiwanese speak... Chinese, French speak French and Spanish speak Spanish."

Don't get upset! (sign in a school in Taipei, on the toilet)

I guess this attitude comes from the old classical Chinese (and Taiwan is an offshoot of China) way of thinking as itself as the "middle country" (that's what the word "China" in Chinese actually means) with a few barbaric nations around it. There is "we Taiwanese/Chinese" and then "those foreigners". Thus it is not uncommon to be asked questions like:

"We in Taiwan think family is very important. What do foreigners think about it?"
Note, the person asking this question wants to hear "family is not so important to us foreigners, we abandon our parents when they are sick" and stuff like that. I have to admit family sense in Taiwan might be stronger than in most part of the world, however, comparing the little island of Taiwan against the rest of the world in a question and while doing that, assuming the rest of the world is everywhere the same, is a very strange concept.

In such a conversation, you will most likely hear something about 5000 years of culture "we have" where "we" means "Taiwan". This is a very funny statement, as Taiwan's present culture is a mix of ancient Chinese culture (hence the 5000 years) and Western influence and Republican ideas of the Kuomintang movement of the late 19th century. Thus, what is Taiwan's culture today is about 60 years old; originates from 1949 when Chian Kai Shek fled to the island of Taiwan running away from the communists in China.
If you ignore this little gap in culture, you can also ignore all European culture shifts and then Germany could at least claim the history of the Roman Empire for itself!

So no more time, have to eat my burger now and flush it down with a coke. That's all we ever eat. We Americans.

Shoe fetish day at the Taiwan blog!

OK, I was cheating you. This is not about the Taiwan girls and their appreciation for high heel shoes...

This blog article is absolutely not about that....


So stop thinking about pics like these....

or these...


.... hey.... stopp it, you make me all nervous!



This article is simply about MY new shoes (he he he)...


... because I have to tell the world how truely amazing these shoes of brand "ASO" truely are. Their regular price is 4000 Taiwandollars or so, which would be 100 Euro, but if you buy three pairs you get them for 360 Taiwandollars in a special offer, that's less than 10 Euro. They are made in Taiwan and truely amazing. I had brought a whole load of cheap German shoes to Taiwan as I normally don't get my size 11 (or a broad 10) here (that's 45 or 46 in German shoe size), but if you order such boats a few weeks in advance you can get them here in Taiwan at ASO outlets. As my two dogs are pulling the leash like maniacs my right heel is huring and so I could not use the cheap shoes from home anymore. Taiwan now makes it possible to have some real expensive shoes, literally by the dozend (I am going to buy lots) and walking on their 5-layer foot bed is a dream. I never want other shoes anymore, ASO forever. ASO is one of Taiwan's two noble brands regarding shoes, the other one is LA NEW (funny name, I know).

MADE IN TAIWAN nowadays stands for quality, got that? And the very-well-made-in-Taiwan ladies on the pics above (all but the orange skirts are by me, the skirts are from old days company server again) could use the new size 11 shoes I have ordered as life boats for the next Taifun rain...

formosa blog: blog.teichert-online.de

other pages:
homepage: teichert-online.de
tech blog: techblog.teichert-online.de
blog overview in categories: globalforeigner.com
taiwan stray dog rescue: stray-dogs.org

Upper tigh or garbage hill: Why are people here (reconstructed...)

A reconstructed blog post from May 2006, the pics were gone and are back now...

http://bobhonest.blogspot.com/2006/05/why-are-people-here.html

It's not me! (EDIT)

it's all about getting laid (without someone calling 911)

German below, Deutsch unten!

ENGLISH: Taiwan is a fabulous place. Almost every guy can see women naked here. Because when you are an overweight guy with bad breath, shave seldomly and still rely on Mum's fashion sense (hey, I do!) and have the muscle structure of a jelly creature from below the deep blue see, there is something strange when you hit the soil of the rock of Taiwan. You become .... latin-lover-like muscular, attractive and charming. And cute 22 something office ladies who should know better, skip their boyfriends and a long hot romance of the xiaojie (f) and the waiguoren (m) starts...

We all know how this ends, finally the English teacher gets deported and then he cries "help, I will never see another women naked".

Help is on the way mate! (dancer at a festival ...)

However there are some who have trouble, but I guess it's because the quantum structure modification which the Taiwan spirit does to the Western overweight body takes a few weeks to kick in. There is a thread in the wastebasket of Taiwan's foreigner Forum forumosa.com and the poor Gentleman is crying out loud: "you are WRONG WRONG WRONG when you think the problem might be me." Not linking to it, he would probably find me and beat me up. Because in a few weeks, he will be all muscles and animal-like sex appeal like all the rest of us.

Let's conclude this post with a muscular "roooooaaaaar" or something.

Taking China oil for good scent,

Ludigel

HINT: When going home, avoid staying over 2 weeks or that Taiwan quantum structure change working on your body will revert back to its original state. And that is no fun. Damned, I still hear the screams of the ladies when they saw me back home before I came here (shiver)... We won't have that happening again.

HINT 2: Try wearing fashionable clothes (see my favourite vest) as long as the quantum structure change hasn't kicked in yet...

famous brand names help!

EDIT: The gentleman said he is Taiwanese. In that case, no chance, forget it. Only works with foreigners that quantum thingy...

photos Ludigel.

EDIT 2: Here is the Japanese version of this story (don't worry, English cartoon)...
Again here: LINK

*

German, Deutsch:

In Taiwan hat man manchmal Ausländer im Forum, die klagen, sie würden keine Frau abkriegen. Nun ist ja Taiwan KEIN Sextouristenland, so einfach durch die Bars ziehen geht auch nicht, da kriegt man ehr eine Flasche über den Kopf gehauen, wenn man mit den Mädels rummacht (Empfehlung: Flying Pig Bar in Hshinzu, bitte einen Helm mitbringen) und so ist es schon frustrierend die vielen hübschen jungen Damen zu sehen und keine abbekommen zu haben, denke ich. Bin ja verheiratet, geht mich alles alles nix an, aber kann mich ja trotzdem über die Nöte der frischen Englischlehrer hier amüsieren. Jedenfalls ändert sich das schon nach kurzer Zeit und die Leute sind mit 3 Freundinnen oder(!) Ehefrau versehen, alles kein Problem, denn es passiert etwas magisches mit westlichen Ausländern in Taiwan. Irgendwie verändert Taiwan die Quantensignatur der frisch gelandeten und schon nach ein paar Wochen verändert sich der Ausländer, auch dem hinterletzten Computerfreak wachsen dicke Muskeln, der Bartwuchs nimmt zu, der Gang wird gerader, der Bauch verschwindet und der neu gewonnene Animal Instinkt (größer ist der Ausländer auch geworden, er kriegt ja nirgends mehr Kleidung in den Geschäften: ich warte schon Wochen auf Schuhe der Größe 46 die eine Bootfirma gerade extra für ich anfertigt) sorgt dafür, dass bald kurz beschurzte Insulanerinnen mit One Night Stand und dann Second und Third und Trauschein winken.



Für den Fall, der Anlass für diesen Artikel war ("Verdammtes Taiwan, ich kriege keine Frau ab, nein nein nein es liegt bestimmt nicht an mir! Ganz sicher nicht!") gibt es allerdings keine Rettung. Der Betreffende, der im Ausländerforum forumosa.com gepostet hat ist gebürtiger Taiwanese, da hilft die Quantenphysik nicht, entweder neues Mundwasser benutzen oder Schuhe und Sturmfrisur wie Kim Il Sung besorgen, sonst ist es halt schwerer.

Nein alles Unsinn, die Lokalen finden ja nun auch ihr lokales Frauchen, nur der Verfasser der o.g. Beschwerde ist ein hoffnungsloser Fall, hat er doch einen Link auf seine eigene Sextourismusseite in der Signatur gehabt. Da ist er hier falsch, gehe nicht über los, ziehe keine Xiaojie (Fräulein) ein, geh mit Gott, aber geh wieder nach Hause (er lebt in einem benachbarten asiatischen Land und war nur zu Besuch).

Kein Link, denn erstens verbreitet der untriebige kleine Kerl Malware und Viren auf seiner Webseite und zweitens ist mir der kleine Hosensch...er zu eklig zum Verlinken.

also nice stuff here

Besides my frequent Taiwan rants, there is also nice stuff here.
Like my dogs running away at the beach and searching trough peoples underwear in bags searching for food. The people (families, younger women) only smile at me even if my dogs almost made them fall. Germans would have called police or at least threaten me with it.

Neighbours right hand side are real nice, big family with many kids, one child tries to talk English to me occasionally liking the dogs. Neighbours left hand side are not bad either, I am starting to like them once they started to take their Karaoke a notch down. But with coming summer, I might nag about them again.

The ex-farmer family who owns the surrounding territory are a friendly helpful bunch also. Usually I do not write about that as I take it for granted.

Would Germans be so nice to, say, an Afroamerican or African in the neighbourhood (I am a German whitebread but I must seem similar exotic to them as an African to Germans)? I guess not!

So, duty done. No wait, colleagues are nice also, not much fighting in offices and people feed me with candy. Girls wear mini skirts and high heels, sometimes distracting from work, but I can live with that (cough). Oh.... that is what I like about Taiwan, I come tired into the office and pretty girls smile at me. Wait.... or didn't I close my zip...???